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| Yes, great ass. But stupid bikini. |
Bikini shopping. Yawn. BUST! So far the bikinis are boring and impractical. Good for laying down, not good for walking. You may think this is sexy *see photo, but picking a bikini out of your ass all day is frustrating and tacky. Not only that, they weren't that nice. SO far. But the adventure continues..
Day 2 NIGHT
Off to Scenarium, with my tour guide (a must have for this bar in this hood, if traveling solo). Essentially, 3 X 2000 sq ft old antique store converted into a live Samba music club.
TODAY'S TOP 5 list - Scenarium WUT WUT!
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| The front of Scenarium |
1) Your skirt isn't short enough - #truth. Mostly. A fitted black dress above my knees was promptly hiked up to just below my ass. How else to dance the Samba with the carioca (a local born and bred in Rio is a Carioca)? And then SING and dance with the carioca. Then sing, dance, and KISS the carioca! *pecks only, relax ;)
2) She's no cougar, that's her grandson - Scenarium is a bar for the WHOLE family. Grandmother and grandson dancing to live samba, while the 8 year old younger sister watches. This is a bar for everyone, and that seems to work well.
3) Can't samba? Now you can! Dance floor + live samba singer (think Shirley Bassey.. in Portugese) = someone picking you up off your ass and teaching you how to samba. I CAN SAMBA! Not only that, (and this may be the biggest compliment in my life EVER which is why I'm sharing), a BRAZILIAN guy said I could dance! I's gots MUVS! #diedandgotoheaven
4) Hungry? Thirsty? Got an hour? - It may take an hour, but the drinks are worth the wait. The food, not so much..
5) Don't believe the hype - well some of it. Scenarium is in Lapa. Lapa is like Toronto at 12am on Richmond St (clubs, 905'ers, and trouble) X hundreds of thousands of people. Some of those (italics for the BADIES) people heard me and my guide speaking English. That meant they followed us until she told them to fuck off. Hmf... sucks. ALSO, the local drink, Caipirinha's are tasty, but I was not shit faced off of three. They are strong, and fruity.. but not black out inducing. So far ;)
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| Tasty Caipirinha |
And finally.. for those that made it this far...
"Natalie, take off your pants. I want to wear them"
This is what I heard early in the evening from my guide (glad she took me, because going alone was risky. Also, Scenarium has some tricky rules once inside.. a bit complicated for a gringa).
Backstory - I had a dress in my purse. I didn't know what the dress code was, so I showed up in skinny black jeans and a tank top. That was ok, but not quite enough. So my guide pushed past the crowd, me in tow, to the washroom to exchange outfits.
Silly Canadian that I am, I went into the stall.
SHE on the other hand, took her pants off right there in the open, telling me to hurry up while she stood around in her undies. Not an dirty look sent her way either!
Outfits exchanged (her jeans in my purse) we promptly returned to the dance floor where she danced up a storm (looking fabu in the new black skinnies) and I shook my tail feather ;) (in my newly shortened dress, thanks to a lovely Carioca girl who shook HER tail feathers all over ME! - photos are somewhere on the interwebs, including a stolen peck on the lips between her and I. Fun times).
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| Scenarium + Thundercats = good times |
The evening, for us, ended around 1am. The bar, still packed to the rafters, still playing live Samba (downstairs) and samba/club/dance upstairs (accompanied by Thundercats and He-Man playing on the wall!).. was filling with prostitutes. Yup, hos. I was quickly ushered out by my guide, who was convinced it was too dangerous for us to stick around, as the bar was filling with the local hookers. Not sure if that was the case, as my Canadian friends (met in ATL) stuck around with no problems. Who knows.. luck of the draw?
The evening ended as it began, on a harrowing ride down bendy streets, through favelas and cute neighbourhoods, back to my house. I almost fell asleep on my feet, but remembered to set my alarm for 7am the next morning.
Day 3 details forthcoming...
Tchau!
N
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