Day 5 & 6 - Reflecting on Rio

Now that I have been here a few days, and I'm starting to settle in, I want to talk a bit about Rio proper.

Top 5 Things I noticed about Rio

1) Layer Cake - If you want to do sports for a week, you can do JUST that. From surfing, to kiting, to volleyball and of course futebol, you could only do that and never see the city and have a great time. If you want to spend a few days just shopping, you can do that too. The shopping is ok, but not exceptional (though there are a few gems like Sacada. You could probably also spend weeks doing a sociological study too. It's really complicated here and rich. Like NYC, but on over drive. And with more guns

Typical Rio car

2) Danger.. just..over.. there.. - While my experience has been really positive, I can tell that there is literally danger just around the corner. Not only are the favelas close by, which means 95% of the people are solid, but the remaining 5% really really aren't. Really. You can see it in the cars; every single one has pitch black tinted windows so you can't see who is inside. 

Kids get picked up by security at private school and there are helicopters flying overhead a lot, ferrying execs to work and back. I don't know where the rich hang out, because I have seen all of 2 suits and a few pair of heels. The rich MAY be in my neighbourhood (they should be, it's the equivalent of Yorkville) but they dress like the sales rack at Suzy Sheer. 

3) Eu nao falo Portugese - Not speaking any Portugese won't get you far. You can get by - kinda, barely. Do yourself a favour, pick up Portugese, even a bit, before you get here. It will pay off in spades.

Photo courtesy silentsweetwords.blogspot.com -
a stunning blog worth checking out

4) Linda linda! - I am 100% over Toronto guy suck face. *Everyone here is worth looking at, and they all look back. It's fun to eye-flirt, or more. Get over yourselves Toronto, it would do us some good to tell others they are cute more often. A bit of oggling never hurt anyone. And there is PLENTY to oggle over here. (sorry boys, but the girls are ok - honestly - but the guys on the beach are spectacular) -- this photo of this girl surfer.. no idea where SHE is, because I have NOT seen anything like this here. at all.


5) Carioca = 416. Someone who is born and raised in Rio is a Carioca, and if both your parents are Carioca then you are Carioca da gema. I hate to be an elitist, but I wouldn't mind so much if Torontonians had a fancy nickname too. We already call everyone from the 905 by their area code, but calling me 416 doesn't have the same ring to it. I'm trying to think of something better....


A couple of videos from the trip....

Lining up for gifties

Kids in the favela, getting some presents at school


A Brazilian Jiu Jitsu fight with a few 9 year olds

Macumba Beach, in Recreio, where I learned to surf







 It is finally over 18C today - so I'm heading back to the beach, to try and get my Toronto summer tan. 


Tchau!
N

Day 4 - To Surf or not to Surf, the BUS is the question

Don't leave home without it

The Plan: get on a bus (instructions provided on the surf school website), go an hour down the road, get off the bus, walk to surf school, SURF.


The Truth: FUCKING RIO BUSES! Are you shitting me?! Awful. Picture this: stand on the Gardiner, post rush hour, and try to read the number on the side of one of 15 buses turning a corner at 60km/hr. THEN step into traffic, and hope to god you catch the drivers attention as you flag him down, then jump out of the way of the cars and him as he come careening to a stop in front of you. That is step 1. Steps Awful to Miserable are too painful to remember.

Top 5 things to know about getting on a bus in Rio

1) Don't. Don't take a bus. Take a cab. Save all your money for cabs.

2) Don't open your eyes. If you didn't listen to #1, then do yourself a favour and don't look out the window. Not only does no one signal, but they change lanes two inches in front of you, while you are all going 80 km/hr down some residential street.

3) Know it to see it – don’t have an address, or a map, or a name, or hope the bus will stop, or announce your stop or anything that seems normal-bus-like. You have to know where your stop is exactly or else you will miss it and end up in a favela or on a highway or on a dirt road. #truth

4) Don’t wait at a bus stop – there aren’t any bus stops (mostly). There are areas where people meander, about a block long, in hopes of flagging down their bus, which of course does not stop unless you step out in front of them.

5) In the front, out the back – sounds simple enough. Go in the front door, which people are already hanging out of, push past them a few feet to get to the gate so you can pay, push through the tiny turnstile and try to shuffle your way to the back of the bus in hopes of being close to the only exit when you see your stop. #nevergoingtohappen

Quiet time at Macumba Beach, Recreio

Now that you have some background, try getting from Rio to a beach an hour away with a hand drawn map, with an address of “6w”.  Not going to happen, UNLESS you are rescued by an angel. My angel was Chico, an English speaking graphic designer plucked me from the bus and took me to safety. I will spare you the long story, but as he was walking me to my cab (to take me to surf school), he turns to me and says:

"Natalie, don't trust strangers here, they see you as a gringa and will take advantage of you. Except me."

After this tear inducing experience (on minimal sleep and an empty stomach), I made it to Rio Surf n Stay, only to find out the surf is too rough and the lesson was canceled. 

 I was actually relieved. This was my first chance to breathe, walk, be quiet and nap. Not to mention enjoy a nice long walk along the beach, watching the breaks, the fishermen and wondering why there was fresh fruit all over Macumba beach.


Ah.. voodoo. But of course.


Tchau...
N

Day 3 - First rule about Fight Club...

Is don't talk about Fight Club.

Yawn, stretch, 7am and I'm awake.. ugh. However, nothing beats cheering on a few Canadians, who I met in the airport by fluke, as they represent at a regional Brazilian Jiu Jitsu competition. Franco - Behring for the WIN!

very bendy, and intimate nao?

Top 5 - BJJ FTW

1) Safety in numbers - more like safety when surrounded by a pack of gold medal winning BJJ fighters. We were in a tough neighbourhood, so tough there was security posted at the ring and outside the doors. Keep in mind we are at the equivalent of a YMCA, but I hear they were packing (that is "code" for have guns.. I watch movies you know). However, I felt 100% safe with our group, because they were tough mo'fos (chicks and guys, from 15 to over 35). And sweet. And English speaking! (a nice change of pace!)


2) Bring food - I was too excited about the day to give it any thought, but if you are going to an all day competition, and you're in a neighbourhood you shouldn't be in, chances are good the concession stand is going to be your only source of food. That means.. meat on a stick that smelt like dog (so much like dog, I had to throw it out. woof), chocolate bars and coke. For 12 hours. #idiotidiotidiot

3) Brazilians can fight - duh. Hockey is to Canadians, as futebol is to Brazilians. However, for some of these guys, I think BJJ was a close second. They were fit, dense and good to go. Also often topless. #takeitalloff


4) You can be THAT parent - you know THAT parent that coaches from the sideline, insults the other kids, yells at the top of their lungs AND pushes to the front? Uh huh. In spades here.


5) A garbage can? No such thing - not just in the gym, but all the cities. Ok, there are SOME garbage cans. And they DO get used. By leprechauns and fairies. 


Actually #6 too..
Window panes? HA! Sure, it's usually +26C, but on those days when it's not, and it's 13C, windy and overcast, it SURE would be nice to see window panes on ANY window in the gym. BRRRRR!!!

12 hour day means lots of napping

That, essentially was the day. Nap, shiver, watch fight, cheer, nap, cheer, clap, nap...  The best part, was that the team placed 6th out of 37! 

Tchau for now..
N

** will try to post videos on Vimeo or YouTube soon. 

Day 2 - Bikini Fail, Samba SUCCESS!

A quick summary before the top 5 (photos to follow shortly..)

Yes, great ass. But stupid bikini.

Day 2
Bikini shopping. Yawn. BUST! So far the bikinis are boring and impractical. Good for laying down, not good for walking. You may think this is sexy *see photo, but picking a bikini out of your ass all day is frustrating and tacky. Not only that, they weren't that nice. SO far. But the adventure continues..





Day 2 NIGHT 
Off to Scenarium, with my tour guide (a must have for this bar in this hood, if traveling solo). Essentially, 3 X 2000 sq ft old antique store converted into a live Samba music club. 

TODAY'S TOP 5 list - Scenarium WUT WUT!

The front of Scenarium

1) Your skirt isn't short enough - #truth. Mostly. A fitted black dress above my knees was promptly hiked up to just below my ass. How else to dance the Samba with the carioca (a local born and bred in Rio is a Carioca)? And then SING and dance with the carioca. Then sing, dance, and KISS the carioca! *pecks only, relax ;)


2) She's no cougar, that's her grandson - Scenarium is a bar for the WHOLE family. Grandmother and grandson dancing to live samba, while the 8 year old younger sister watches. This is a bar for everyone, and that seems to work well.


3) Can't samba? Now you can! Dance floor + live samba singer (think Shirley Bassey.. in Portugese) = someone picking you up off your ass and teaching you how to samba. I CAN SAMBA! Not only that, (and this may be the biggest compliment in my life EVER which is why I'm sharing), a BRAZILIAN guy said I could dance! I's gots MUVS! #diedandgotoheaven


4) Hungry? Thirsty? Got an hour? - It may take an hour, but the drinks are worth the wait. The food, not so much..


5) Don't believe the hype - well some of it. Scenarium is in Lapa. Lapa is like Toronto at 12am on Richmond St (clubs, 905'ers, and trouble) X hundreds of thousands of people. Some of those (italics for the BADIES) people heard me and my guide speaking English. That meant they followed us until she told them to fuck off. Hmf... sucks. ALSO, the local drink, Caipirinha's are tasty, but I was not shit faced off of three. They are strong, and fruity.. but not black out inducing. So far ;)

Tasty Caipirinha 

And finally.. for those that made it this far...

"Natalie, take off your pants. I want to wear them"

This is what I heard early in the evening from my guide (glad she took me, because going alone was risky. Also, Scenarium has some tricky rules once inside.. a bit complicated for a gringa).

Backstory - I had a dress in my purse. I didn't know what the dress code was, so I showed up in skinny black jeans and a tank top. That was ok, but not quite enough. So my guide pushed past the crowd, me in tow, to the washroom to exchange outfits.

Silly Canadian that I am, I went into the stall.
SHE on the other hand, took her pants off right there in the open, telling me to hurry up while she stood around in her undies. Not an dirty look sent her way either!

Outfits exchanged (her jeans in my purse) we promptly returned to the dance floor where she danced up a storm (looking fabu in the new black skinnies) and I shook my tail feather ;) (in my newly shortened dress, thanks to a lovely Carioca girl who shook HER tail feathers all over ME! - photos are somewhere on the interwebs, including a stolen peck on the lips between her and I. Fun times).

Scenarium + Thundercats = good times

The evening, for us, ended around 1am. The bar, still packed to the rafters, still playing live Samba (downstairs) and samba/club/dance upstairs (accompanied by Thundercats and He-Man playing on the wall!).. was filling with prostitutes. Yup, hos. I was quickly ushered out by my guide, who was convinced it was too dangerous for us to stick around, as the bar was filling with the local hookers. Not sure if that was the case, as my Canadian friends (met in ATL) stuck around with no problems. Who knows.. luck of the draw? 


The evening ended as it began, on a harrowing ride down bendy streets, through favelas and cute neighbourhoods, back to my house. I almost fell asleep on my feet, but remembered to set my alarm for 7am the next morning. 


Day 3 details forthcoming...


Tchau!
N

Day 1 - Landed. Ate. Favela. Ate.

Arriving in Rio

 For those that don't want to read - I am going to kick off each day with a Top "insert number here" list.

Day 1: Top 5 Double Takes

1) Coops full of live chickens in a butcher shop. Kinda takes the mystery out of it doesn't it?

2) Woah traffic. I would strongly advise not renting a car, unless you have a death wish. I drive a scooter, and I can drive aggressively, but the motorcycles zipping between lanes, two inches of clearance between bumpers and willy-nilly merging almost gave me a stroke. 

3) Woah surfers. Typically surfing is done far away from me on a beach "way out there" where the surfers are tiny little specs. Not here. They are RIGHT at your doorstep. It's a treat. So are the surfers themselves *shiver. 

Sunset in Leblon

4) Need crackers? Buy them from the guy selling them in between lanes of highway traffic out of a bag when there is a traffic jam. Or even when there isn't. 

5) 1 in 4 or 5 inhabitants live in favelas. Yup, favelas that until recently weren't even on a map. They were shown as jungles. Some of the favelas are as small as 2,500 people, and some as big at 300,000. More on favelas later.

If you want more... here ya go.

Let me get this out of the way: how safe is Rio De Janeiro? On day 1, I can safe "safe enough". I was told to keep money in my shoes and wear no jewelry. What I've seen of the locals runs completely contrary to that. Women DO wear jewelry (earrings, watches, necklaces) and DO have purses!! What a relief! I only brought so many baggy pants and I was NOT going to wear one of those ridiculous waist belts (I may come to regret this later).  I walked around with a small black purse snugly under my arm and didn't feel out of place. In terms of being out on the streets alone, so far the beach + Ipanema + Leblon by myself, in daylight and at night, has been safe.

Before I left Toronto, I pictured Rio as essentially Miami beach back filled by favelas. That is not entirely untrue. It does have lots of shiny, pish posh type hotels and condos facing the ocean and the beach is big, and white and sunny, however it is WAY bigger than Miami (you laugh - because it sounds so obvious, but when you're day dreaming, size doesn't matter) and Miami's architecture is easier on the eyes. Also, the favelas don't back fill so much as "be beside/be on/be near/be behind" you. There is one a few doors down from me, in Leblon.

 A good piece of advice: if you are traveling alone, join a short tour to orient yourself AND to meet other tourists. It's a quick win for the inside scoop + some learning on the cheap-ish. 

Graffiti in Vila Canoas, a favela in Rio

 I went with Favela Tour (Marcelo Armstrong's company). It was highly rated and reviewed and sounded like a good jumping off point. Our tour guide, Martha Vasconcellos was friendly, knowledgeable and honest. I learned a lot but won't bore you with details (though I should, so I can remember them later) but some of the highlights include:

-- a few stops in Rocinha. A favela of over 200,000 people 

-- a walk about in Vila Canoas. A favela of only 2,500

-- learning that the government (it appears) is working closely with the people of the favelas to give them the rights of a full fledged citizen. Including officially owning property and being given the funds for infrastructure often afforded to the rich and middle class.

-- it's worth doing a tour to know, instead of guess/suspect/fear

  
There is a lot of information online about favelas, but I did find watching City of God, Bus 174 and Favela Rising really helpful in giving me insights into the history and possible future. Martha also mentioned that City of God was almost 100% accurate. Good to know, I guess? Eep!


 Speaking of Eep - this thread is getting painfully long. Tomorrow it's supposed to rain, so that may mean malls + galleries + national library. Or it could mean sleeping in and checking Facebook. Let's hope it's the former. 


Tchau for now!
N